Bed Rest, Day 10
Baby’s Gestational Age: 28 weeks, 5 days
Reading: Steve Jobs biography; assorted magazines
Watching: Arrested Development, Season 1; The Big C, Season 1
Being constantly thwarted watching: The View
Not watching because the hospital doesn’t have a channel they really, absolutely, definitely should have: BravoSince there seem to be so many people out there who are clearly devoid of a filter and/or who have no idea when to shut their pie-holes, here is a (noncomprehensive) list of things not to say to a person who’s confined to their hospital bed.
Use it as a jumping off point.
You’re bound to think I made some of these up for comedic effect but I want to assure you that each and every one of them has been said to me in the last 10 days.
Yes, even #1.
And to the person who said #3. You know who you are. And you bet your ass I’m gonna get even with you one day.
Top 10 Things NOT to Say To A Person on Hospital Bed Rest
9. You wouldn’t believe the steak I had last night.
8. What a great opportunity to catch up on your TV!
7. At least you don’t have to worry about going to the gym.
6. Wow. You’re not gonna see your dogs for months.
5. You must really miss your bed at home.
4. How are you? (Slight pause) Weeelllll, I’ve got the flu again.
3. I just had 2 Patron shots in your honor.
2. Is the baby gonna have a lot of problems if he’s born this early?
1. I’m pretty sure I got MERSA when I was in the hospital.